10 foods a cat must never eat (and one medicine)

Cats are brilliant at looking at your plate as if they haven't eaten for a week. Don't fall for it. Some very normal human foods can make a cat seriously ill, and a few can be deadly. Watch the short film above for the quick version, then keep this list somewhere handy.

The ten foods to keep off the menu

1. Onions, garlic, chives and leeks

All members of the onion family can damage red blood cells and cause anaemia, and cats are more sensitive to them than dogs. It doesn't matter whether they are raw, cooked or powdered: watch out for onion or garlic powder hidden in gravies, stock, soups, sauces and some baby foods. Signs of poisoning can take a few days to appear, so call your vet even if your cat seems fine.

2. Chocolate

Chocolate contains stimulants called methylxanthines. They can cause vomiting and diarrhoea, restlessness, a racing or irregular heartbeat, tremors and, in serious cases, seizures. The darker the chocolate (and baking chocolate especially), the more dangerous it is.

3. Coffee, tea and energy drinks

The same family of stimulants is found in coffee, tea, energy drinks and caffeine tablets. A few licks of a latte are unlikely to be a disaster, but coffee grounds, tea bags and energy drinks are real risks. Keep mugs out of reach.

4. Alcohol

Alcohol is absorbed quickly and hits a small body hard: vomiting, wobbliness, breathing problems, tremors, and even coma and death. That includes cocktails, liqueur desserts and anything soaked in rum. If your cat drinks any, go to the vet straight away.

5. Grapes and raisins

Grapes and raisins have caused kidney failure in dogs, and nobody yet knows exactly which substance is responsible. Until we know more, vets advise keeping them away from cats too. That includes raisin bread, fruit cake and trail mix.

6. Raw bread dough

Raw yeast dough keeps rising in the warm stomach, which can cause painful bloating. As the yeast ferments, it also produces alcohol. Baked bread is a different story: a tiny bit is not dangerous, but it isn't cat food either.

7. Milk and dairy

Forget the cartoon cat with a saucer of milk. Most adult cats don't produce enough lactase, the enzyme that digests milk sugar, so milk and dairy often cause diarrhoea and stomach upset. Fresh water is the best drink for a cat.

8. Raw meat, raw fish and raw eggs

Raw meat, fish and eggs can carry bacteria such as Salmonella and E. coli, which can make cats (and the humans cleaning up after them) ill. Raw egg white also contains avidin, which can interfere with a B vitamin.

9. Cooked bones and fat trimmings

Cooked bones can splinter and cause injuries or blockages in the gut. Fat trimmings can cause vomiting and diarrhoea, and may trigger pancreatitis. No leftovers from the Sunday roast.

10. Salty snacks

Crisps, pretzels, salted popcorn and salty ham are too much salt for a cat. Large amounts can cause vomiting, diarrhoea, tremors and seizures (sodium poisoning). Crisps are for humans with regrets.

Bonus: the most dangerous thing in your kitchen cupboard

It isn't food, but it matters more than anything on this list: never give your cat paracetamol (acetaminophen). For cats it can be fatal. Human anti-inflammatory painkillers such as ibuprofen and aspirin are also dangerous for cats. Never give a cat any medicine that your vet hasn't prescribed for them.

What to do if your cat has eaten something on this list

1. Don't wait for symptoms. Call your vet or the nearest 24-hour emergency clinic straight away.
2. Tell them what, how much and when. Even a rough guess helps.
3. Take the packaging with you. Ingredients and amounts save precious time.
4. Don't try to make your cat vomit at home unless your vet tells you to.

So what can I give my cat?

A complete cat food gives your cat everything they need. If you want to share something special, a small piece of plain, cooked, unseasoned chicken or fish (no bones, no skin, no sauce) is a much safer treat. Keep treats small, so they don't replace real meals.

With a house full of curious noses, the easiest rule is simple: human food stays on human plates. His Majesty disagrees, but His Majesty is not a vet.